Sunday, September 10, 2006 [ 2:17 PM ] ;
0 repliesThis may sound weird, but I had this short conversation with myself running through my head, while I was doing some housework to get my mind off things. So much for doing the chores. The more sensible part of me was trying to talk some sense into my dominant self, which was pretty much kind of a sad, negative, filled with dark thoughts kind of entity.
We talked through everything again(kind of, the conversation was kind of warped). We tried to get my bearings in order, which pretty much sways with certain external conditions. If they're good, Im good. If they're not, I go south.
Im pretty much trying stabilise myself. Its like if I want to save this, I have to be able to save myself first.
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Wonder what my home tutor would say if she found out about this. Year1 I had problems, year2 I had problems, and now year3 I have problems. Oh wait, I know what she'll say.
Concentrate on your studies! Its the most important thing of your life now. You know? You know? You know? You know?
I dont need that, so she wouldnt find out. As for the most important thing of my life, let me rate those for myself. Its my life. Not yours. But I do agree. Studies are indeed important.
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Its sunday. I gave a promise to my friends a week ago that I'll snap out by today. "Give me a week." I said then. Now it seems like if I want to keep that promise, I'll have to fight myself to do it.
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Addon:
Everyday Im fighting against my own thoughts and fears which are slowly but surely consuming me. I cant stop it, but Im fighting it.
